"If the applicant is young, we tell him he's too young. Old, too old. Fat, too fat." - Fight Club by Jim Uhls

You Don't Own Me

1. You Don't Own Me

   Song by Lesley Gore
2. You don't own me
   I'm not just one of your many toys
   You don't own me
   Don't say I can't go with other boys

   And don't tell me what to do
   Don't tell me what to say
   And please, when I go out with you
   Don't put me on display 'cause

   You don't own me
   Don't try to change me in any way
   You don't own me
   Don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay

   I don't tell you what to say
   I don't tell you what to do
   So just let me be myself
   That's all I ask of you

   I'm young and I love to be young
   I'm free and I love to be free
   To live my life the way I want
   To say and do whatever I please

   And don't tell me what to do
   Oh, don't tell me what to say
   And please, when I go out with you
   Don't put me on display

   I don't tell you what to say
   Oh, don't tell you what to do
   So just let me be myself
3. That's all I ask of you. 

Realism from the trenches

Here's a nice dose of realism for those of us who've perhaps seen a few too many memes about following our dreams, chasing our hearts, and running barefoot in a field of daises rather than pay bills.
First, to get you in the frame of mind, we have this:

There's no arguing with this. We've all been there. We don't want to go. We don't want another job. We don't want to pay bills. We wouldn't like it. 

Then there's Alan Watts on "What Do You Desire if Money Were No Object"

"[If you go after the money] You'll be doing things you don't like doing in order to go on to live a life doing things you don't like doing. Which is stupid!" - Alan Watts.

So there's definitely that corner. We've all heard it. We've all internalized it. We've argued with parents and spouses about it. We've felt guilty about it.

Now here's the other corner that says you took time following those dreams, and maybe just didn't make the money that you know you could have made by doing that day job.

That's the quandary.
Here's the deal. Here's an article from filmmaker Joe Swanberg in Filmmaker Magazine "On the Financial Life of an Independent Filmmaker." Swanberg is -- in many people's minds -- a successful indie filmmaker. He's been at it for years -- he has a multi-season web series, quite a few features that premiered at SXSW.  Recently, he has progressed to films staring name actors like Anna Kendrick and others. The super under the title of the article reads "Transparency benefits everybody." And transparent he is. One pull quote from the article,

"From the outside, you seem like a huge success. But the idea that even with all that success you’re just getting to neutral is intense." - Esther B. Robinson, Filmmaker Magazine, July 25, 2014.

Here's how he has been able to make it work:
Happy Christmas Director Joe Swanberg on the Financial Life of the Independent Filmmaker | Filmmaker Magazine

Another great, helpful article for those twittering on the edge of "Keep my day job or lose it?" is this gem from author/agent Mandy Hubbard. 
In the article, Hubbard addresses what many aspiring authors wonder: How much could I get paid for this?
Her answer, in short: Don't quit your day job.

Many YA novel advances are in the 2,000 range and that check might be divided into thirds. Even if you get an amazing mega-money book deal, while you will be able to quit the day job, you're not going to be rich. However, you'll be earning a living doing what you love, which was the point in the first place.

The trick is that getting where you want to be is hard work. If you're still at it after all these years, you know that. In fact you've probably been around long enough to meet a few of your heroes, get to know how life might be on the other side. I've seen my heroes driving around in beat up trucks, living in modest houses, and wearing that same t-shirt over and over again. They do this for a reason. A) Yes, it's easier to just pick up that same t-shirt off the floor and put it on rather than look for something clean but B) They're not rich. Even if they are making good money, they're either putting it back in for the next film or using it to pay the bills. It ain't easy.

So if you're doing ok keeping the writing going and keeping some kind of day job, go ahead and do it. You'll be able to afford to keep at it for the long haul -- which was the goal in the first place, right?
Good luck.

I'm sorry - we are not accepting unsolicited rejection

Thank your for your interest in [PROJECT]. Unfortunately, we are not accepting unsolicited rejection at this time. Your rejection has been unread and has been forwarded to our legal team. Thank you again for your interest and best of luck with your future endeavors.

Sincerely,
Me

Mel Blanc was rejected by Warner Brothers every two weeks for two years!

Mel Blanc, the voice of nearly all Warner Brothers' cartoons, went to Warner Brothers every two weeks for TWO YEARS asking for an audition. They always told him "Thanks, we already have all the voices we need." Fortunately, he was determined and finally bonded with another musician at the studio who listened to his voices and then got him an audition.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPUUZ2XETI8

Thank you sir, may I have another?

This was a good article about getting back up after you fall.
http://elitedaily.com/life/motivation/getting-back-back-up-after-you-fall/

Sometimes when faced with rejection, it's hard to think of anything good at all. You've heard the term "count your blessings."That's the time to do it-- when you're at rock bottom and feel like nothing is good, you're wasting your time and someone (everyone?) is repeatedly kicking you in the teeth.

One thing I've learned: someone always has it worse. Got rejected by that thing you wanted? Someone else had a debilitating car accident and can't even do that thing anymore. Whatever your problem is, someone else has the same thing but worse. One thing you never see in the movies is someone hitting rock bottom and then delving further. Sometimes in life it feels like that's happening. There's a MEME that suggests you yell "PLOT TWIST!" and move on.

I have no advice other than read the article in the link above and perhaps trying my own personal invention, the Cookie Cleanse.

What's a Cookie Cleanse, you ask?
1. Stay in.
2. Make homemade chocolate chip cookies.
3. The only food you ingest today, your designated Cookie Cleanse day, will be cookies.  No sandwiches, no soup, no salad. Just cookies. Warm ones. Gooey. Straight from the oven. You're allowed to drink milk with the cookies. But that's it. That's your day. Milk and cookies.
4.  Don't  mess around and try to make an ice cream cookie sandwich or anything fancy. Just go about your day (staying IN), watch TV, movies, read books, laundry is ok but no major cleaning.... and when you get hungry eat a cookie. Take it from the Oracle: you'll feel right as rain.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvaE_HCMimQ

Climbing Mt. Everest

What is success? When have you reached your goals?
There comes a point when you've been striving a long time.
Maybe you want to be a writer, maybe you want to be a ballerina, astronaut, whatever.
Are you an astronaut the moment you get your NASA badge, or the day you launch to the moon?
Robert Rodriguez says in his book, Rebel Without a Crew: "You want to be a director? Make yourself a business card. Now you're a director. Next!"

The same is true for writing.

But you spend so much time STRIVING.
Because at what point is a writer a writer?
The day you first pick up a pencil and copy the ABCs?
The day you write your first story?
The day your English teacher recognizes that you have skill?
The day your news article lands above the fold on the front page?
The day you're published in a magazine?
The day you win an award?
The day someone hires you to write for them?

All of those are the point at which one becomes a writer.

Sometimes you can spend so much time striving you forget to look up and realize you're actually there.

You also get used to apologizing for the fact that you aren't in the Amazon Top 100, or the New York Times Best Sellers or that your movie was a short and not a feature or an indie feature and not a Hollywood feature or it was released in theaters but was not a blockbuster, or it was a blockbuster but not an Oscar-winner. Or it was nominated but didn't win. Or it won, but...

Enough!
You are a writer.
The life is: get up, make a cup of coffee, sit down, fill screen. Repeat.
Enjoy!

Highly recommended:

This is a really great book. Walt Disney was an optimist to the core. There were days he literally had no shoes-- he was supposed to pick up a desperately needed paycheck but couldn't meet the guy because his only pair of shoes were being repaired and he couldn't get them back until he paid the cobbler. He ate beans straight out of the can. But he could sell anyone on his ideas because he was optimistic and enthusiastic and honest.

On a recent trip to Disney World the character meal at the Crystal Palace was totally booked for months. We wanted to go. We thought we'd go ahead and try it, but when we got there there were tons of people milling around. The odds didn't look good. But we really wanted to, so we went up and asked the guy at the front desk. He smiled and said, well, we don't have anything available right now. But can you wait twenty minutes?

YES, WE CAN!

http://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Like-Walt-Capturing/dp/0757302319/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1361926850&sr=8-1&keywords=how+to+be+like+walt